Run With Horses

Family Friday: Discipling Your Children PART 1

Discipling your children
 
Importance of discipling your children.
 
What do we mean by discipling?
 
Were you discipled? By Who? How?
 
Shared resources. Encouragement.
 
Helping them follow Jesus, to be a disciple themselves.
 
What do they need to know? Age-appropriate
 
What have you learned along the way that has helped you_
 
How can you find out if you don’t know? Forces you to grow yourself.
You can’t teach something you don’t know, do.
 
Basis is life on life. Life together. Intentionally share your journey of following Jesus with your children.

Marriage A to Z: Are You Listening?

Listen
What?
Definitions
Listen vs. Understand vs Hearing
Engaged listening
What hinders it?
Distracted, not focused.
Poor timing. Environment noisy, distracting.
Physical pain, sickness
Assumptions, assuming you know without actually listening, preconceived ideas
Critical spirit kills people talking
Should we ever not listen?
Gossip/slander
Listen to heart/message behind the words (problem, whining, speaking untruths); address the main issue, not condemn result of illness, real problem, etc. Goal is help them deal with it better way.
What if someone never quits talking?! Depends on who it is. Able to set some boundaries; encourage spouse to hang out with friends. Help them see your need for quiet and mental health
What if spouse won’t talk? Figure out why … not a talker? Critical of spouse? Interrupt? Make difficult for them to talk; some unresolved issue between you?
What about when someone is attacking you? Listen to understand. Legitimate? Their problem?
 
Why?
Listening is the foundation for communication. Communication is foundation to relationship
God tells us – quick to hear, slow to speak; His example of hearing our cry
Shows respect
Good for the relationship!
Need to communicate to live peaceably together; get things done
Not being understood is frustrating!!!!!!!!
 
 
How To?
Focus
Set aside time for important discussions, topics
Set aside time for non-important stuff
Limit distractions – choose location, time (more important for critical topics)
Refuse to think ahead to your response; focus on listening first.
Be okay with quiet, and give each other time to think.
Try rewording spouse’s point of view
Be patient – understanding is worth the effort
Body language (Don Trott)
Understand the value the other person brings to the table
Don’t let stuff build up; talk before there are issues!
 
 

Does Group Size Matter in Making Disciples?

Group size and Disciple Making – Does It Matter?
 
Faith Communities Today Research 2020
“Our best estimates are there are between 350,000 and 375,000 congregations of all faith traditions
within the nation. The trends around size will be addressed in a bit, but the vast majority of the country’s congregations are small. 70% of these faith communities have 100 or fewer weekly attendees. Only 10% of them have more than 250 in weekly services. However, far more people attend these larger congregations – roughly 70% of all attendees – than the many smaller ones. Those smallest communities of 100 or less are home to only 14% of all weekly attendees. “ (1)
 
Most churches have fewer than 100 people on Sunday mornings.
Most People go to a church of over 250 people on Sunday mornings.
 
“I’ve heard that churches with 30 percent of their adult worship attendance in small groups are in the top one half of one percent of all churches in the U.S.” -
 
Congregation – Large Group – whole church, 100 people {1500}
 
Sunday School - Mid-size Group – a subset of the church, 10-20 people {100}
 
Bible Study - Small Group – 8-12 people {20-30}
 
A Table – Micro Group – 3-5 people
 
One-to-one - 2 people
 
What is Important for Spiritual Growth and Maturity?
Personal invitations are important.
Prayer – with and for each other.
Commitment to each other – we miss you when you aren’t here.
Transparency – we all struggle.
Reading the Bible together. Not just a sermon, but reading passages together.
Bible Memorization – encouraged, supported and checked on.
 
Resources:
(1)https://faithcommunitiestoday.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/Faith-Communities-Today-2020-Summary-Report.pdf

How is Your Character?

Developing Strong Character
William Straton Bruce, The Formation of Christian CharacterCharacter is nature and nurture. It is nature cultured and disciplined, so that natural tendencies are brought under the sway of the moral motive. His natural individuality marks off a man from his fellows by clear and specific differences. But this individuality may be non-moral. To produce character it must be brought under discipline, and organized into the structure of a true moral being . . .Above all, [character] includes a choice, a settled habit or bent of will, so that it can be seen in its outcome in conduct. 
Historian Warren SusmanDuring the 1800s, “character was a key word in the vocabulary of Englishmen and Americans,” and men were spoken of as having strong or weak character, good or bad character, a great deal of character or no character at all. Young people were admonished to cultivate real character, high character, and noble character and told that character was the most priceless thing they could ever attain. Starting at the beginning of the 20th century, however, Susman found that the ideal of character began to be replaced by that of personality.
What is it?  We all know it when we see it.Honesty  IntegrityCourage  LoyaltyWork ethic  Self-ControlDiscipline  KindnessMercy   Patience
Why should you care? Who you are is important. Your character affects every relationship, job and experience that you have.Your family, your community, your church all need men and women of character.Your choices create your character. Choices matter.Intentional choices create intentional character.Who do you want to be? More importantly, Who does God want you to be?What kind of person are you as you walk through the world?
How do you develop your character?· Develop awareness - Recognize good character• Know God’s standards and ideal for you• Meditate on God's Word – particularly men like David and Paul• Pray for growth, wisdom, and courage to be the person you can be• Beware of your weak areas. Avoid temptation ... flee...• Choose friends w/ strong character> learn to Serve others• Learn patience, make thoughtful choices, not rash, too quick decisions.
 

Marriage A to Z: A Kingdom Focus

A Kingdom Focus for Your Marriage
 
WHAT
choices
priorities, focus
values
relationships
 
WHY
temporal vs. eternal
Too easy to get distracted by world/life
value
gives purpose, clarity of purpose
guides decision making, use of resources/time/energy
makes life simpler, narrows choices/options
Relieves fear for future, needs
adds stability; foundation, solid basis for life
 
HOW TO
Remember!
Talk together about it; decide together on values, priorities
Serve together
Filter choices through this lens
Keep in the Word of God; discuss together
Prayer
Church community
 
 
 
 

Why I don’t make Disciples. . . Excuses, Excuses!

Looking for questions and topics for future shows! Calling for requests and suggestions! Write us at talk@runwithhorses.net or the Run With Horses Podcast Facebook page. https://www.facebook.com/RWHpodcast
If what we are doing is helpful to you, we want to know about it. Our goal is to encourage and equip you to be more like Jesus as you walk through the journey of life. We are in this together. Let’s encourage each other. If there is someone you believe would benefit from the things we talk about, let them know how to find us. Www.runwithhorses.net is the best place for information and links to all previous shows. Thanks for your prayers and support!
 
Why I don't disciple... Excuses.
 
1) No Time - Too Busy
2) Don't Know How
3) Don't know who
4) Don't have good materials.
5) It's the pastor's Job.
6) Not my role
7) I need to grow more first.
8) It's not important
9) My church has a class
10) Don't know where to start
11) I was never discipled /No experience
12) Tried before & failed
13) Can't find someone who will
14) Not my spiritual gift
15) I don't want to!
16) Too hard, too messy.

Family Friday: A look at furlough from the midpoint

The Smith family is in the midwest on a 7 month furlough before returning to Japan. If you want to follow along with the ministry side of things, Susan manages www.smithlife.net to let people know more about life and ministry in Japan.
 

Marriage A to Z: Joy in Your Marriage

Joy! Where do you find yours? 
 
Joy of knowing you have a companion for the long haul (as far as we know); togetherness.
 
Joy of misunderstanding . . . and finding humor in it afterward.
 
Joy in growing to know each other better – and be known better than by anyone else in the world.
 
Joy in finding ways to please him/her.
 
Joy of serving together.
 
Joy of seeing fruit in ministry and in our family.
 
Joy of shared interests.
 
Joy of spending time together, enjoying each other’s company.
 
Joy in shared history, memories, challenges, triumphs.
 
Joy of growing spiritually and seeing it in each other; encouraging, uplifting, helping. You for them, them for you.
 
Joy of sharing with other couples the things you’ve learned.
 
Joy of learning sacrifice, unselfishness, and humility.
 
Joy of multiplying strengths (and weaknesses!)
 
Jesus
Others
You
 
Sometimes there is joy in the circumstance. Most of the time joy comes outside of the circumstance. Because of who you’re doing it with or for. In the short run, it may not be what you’d choose; but if you see the purpose (and it’s not YOU), you can find joy.

Questions about Making Disciples

Questions and Answers! Send your questions to talk@runwithhorses.net to be included in the next listener Q&A.
Is discipleship just for new Christians?
What if my church is not doing anything intentional to make disciples now?
How long does it take?
What materials should I use?
How do you know where a person should start?
How do we define a “win” when it comes to making disciples?
What about training leaders?
How do you start a discipling relationship? What do you say to invite someone into this? What approach?
What kind of person is worth discipling? Who needs it?
How do you know when training is completed?
What do I do next?

Roles of a Disciple Maker

For resources we recommend on making disciples, check out the resources page of our website, www.runwithhorses.net
 
Roles of a Disciple Maker
Each role emphases a different aspect of making disciples.
 
Teacher – facts, transmit information, can do in a group of most any size.
 
Coach – includes evaluation as well as practical instruction, application of truth
 
Mentor – most often seen in an more mature disciple sharing their experience and lessons learned through practice.
 
Counselor – helping work through problems or issues that hinder spiritual growth.
 
Advisor – walking through potential decisions coming up, brainstorming, working through options
 
Model – Live out biblical principles with them. Explaining the WHY as well as modeling the WHAT.
 
Librarian - resource person, sharing books, websites, even contacts with the goal of helping people grow
 
Cheerleader – encouragement and motivation
 
Co-worker – serve together, come alongside
 
Tools of a Disciple Maker
Prayer – pray with and for others
Questions – using quesitons to guide the person you are discipling to understand the truth you study in scripture makes it sink in more than telling them the answer.
Listening – really pay attention to what is being said as well as how it is said.
Truth - Bible knowledge
Your Example - Model
Experience – share what you have learned, through successes and failures. Remind yourself and others of God’s faithfulness.
Encouragement - It's ok, try again.
Motivation - You can do it.
Time Together – more than training and ministry, just being, life together is important and provides the context for disciple making.
The Church Family!